If you’re looking for advice on how to fix a broken heart then your heart must be aching right now.
Losing someone you love is one of the most difficult things you’ll ever go through. I’ve had my share of heartbreaks and am all too familiar with how it feels like to be on the receiving end of a break up. It hurts, it really does. You feel like it’s the end of the world and you wonder how you can possibly get over it. It’s perfectly normal to experience pain after a break up and you may have moments of despair as well; but I promise you that you will get over it.
How to Fix a Broken Heart in 5 Simple Steps
1. Allow Yourself to Feel the Pain
When pain strikes, our instinct is to avoid it. So although it’s tempting to try to numb out in attempt to escape the pain you’re feeling, I urge you to NOT try to hide from it. This will not make the pain go away. As a famous psychologist named Carl Jung says, “What we resist, persists.”
The best way to deal with the pain is by facing it fully. Let the reality of what just happened sink in. Close your eyes and fully experience that feeling of pain within your being. Detach yourself from the situation and simply become the observer of that pain. Be with it fully. Cry if you have to. Don’t judge yourself for it, it’s perfectly normal to want to cry after a break up. In fact, it’s actually very healing and it can really help you heal a broken heart. Not only that, but letting it out will be extremely liberating and it feel like you just had a heavy burden lifted off your shoulders.
2. Talk about What Happened
Find someone close to you that you can trust and confide in and talk to them about what happened. This will allow you to verbalize your thoughts and feelings and make sense of what happened. Through this process, you will gain a better understanding of the situation at hand and what you can do about it. After you do this, you will have a greater perspective on what you can actually do to heal a broken heart.
3. Surround Yourself with Positive People
After you get your heartbroken, it’s tempting to go into a negative downward spiral and feel like your whole world is caving in. Therefore, it’s absolutely crucial that you surround yourself with positive energy. Reconnect with friends and family. Seek out positive people. Be around people who are happy and can make you laugh.
4. Look for Lessons to Learn
Everything happens for a reason and I believe that good things can come out of every situation, even the ones we initially perceive as “bad.” What did you learn from this relationship? Spend some time sitting silently with yourself and reflecting on what happened and why it happened. Have a journal and pen handy so that you can write things down when you have a realization. Journaling is an extremely powerful tool that can help you sort out your thoughts and feelings and gain a lot of clarity on things. Focus on all the valuable life lessons that you learned from this experience that you wouldn’t have learned otherwise. Seeing the positive can help heal a broken heart.
5. Acknowledge the Benefits of the Breakup
Focus on how this new situation can help you. Maybe now you’ll finally have the free time to pursue something that’s really important to you that you kept putting off when you were in a relationship. Maybe you can finally gain the freedom and independence that you’ve wanted to experience. Write a list in your journal of all the good things that are going to come as a result of the break up? What are you happy to finally have the freedom to do? One of the best ways to heal a broken heart is to focus on the benefits that this can have on your life, rather than focusing on how shitty life is without your ex. Losing someone you love is obviously never a great feeling but a simple shift in focus can help you look at the bright side and make the best out of this situation.
If you’re feeling confused or frustrated about something that happened between you and your ex, click below to get my advice on how to fix a broken heart based on your specific situation